Optimus Prime: It's you and me, Megatron.
Megatron: No, it's just me, Prime.
Judy Witwicky: We don't have to call it masturbating. We can call it Sam's Happy Time!
Ratchett: [scanning Sam's body] The pheromone levels in the male indicate he wants to mate with the female.
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: So...
Maggie Madsen: What are you here for?
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: I bought a car. Turned out to be an alien robot.
Glen: [whispered] Wow...!
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: Who knew?
Ironhide: [brandishing large cannons] Parents are irritating... Should I take 'em out?
Optimus Prime: Ironhide, you know we don't harm humans!
Ironhide: I know, I'm just saying... it's an option...